The Hitachi Magic Wand. (Maybe Too) Powerful Vibrator. Excellent Back Massager. Really.
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I’m catsitting for my friend L., whose mother taught me this weekend that miracles do happen…that is, if you believe. I don’t know how much she’d want me going into any detail, but let’s just say - I believe!!!

Sitting here, in her apt., with full use of an internet connection, three cats, one of whom used to be mine…and as my grandmother describes him, he (or she since she always calls the boy a girl) “has the nicest fur she’s ever felt on a cat.” He’s super lovey, like right now he’s staring adoringly at me and rubbing on my computer (like mother, like son), and I feel like I’m couch surfing once again, even though I’m (thankfully) not. It’s just reminding me of not too long ago. Now Silly, the cat that has two mommies, has just crawled into my lap. I’m feeling the love.

Five minutes later and now he’s gone and my mind is wandering to thoughts of what guy’s often do when they have nothing else to do..and I’m not talking about watching TV or picking my nose (although I do love the latter anyday)…why am I always horny?!!!

LIKE
The funny thing is I don’t want to be hooking up with random strangers right now. I don’t have the urge, the itch, that burning desire that is not associated with vaginal yeast. I like a boy and when I like someone I’m more monogamous that when I don’t…which makes perfect sense…but I’m even more monogamous than most of my friends who aren’t all that monogamous.

What I don’t believe in is forced monogamy, which is why I am harping on the subject of being monogamous now. I guess cause it’s not forced at all right now, because of that, it’s just the way I feel like being. We are all human beings, all animals, we like to hump each other, we aren’t really supposed to be limited to one mate. But for now he’s the only boy I want. And even though I have the option to do what I want, I don’t want to do anything. Well, not anything, I do want to do some work, and get some sleep and spend part of any day in a room with the someone that I like. A lot. For now. Is that addiction?

WORK
There’s decisions to be made about work. It’s as if I’m surfing yet again, but this time a wave and not a couch, and while I use balance and the power of thought to stay on the board, I need to just relax and let the wave take me on its ride as well. Cause then it just might happen. This whole “next level” thing just might happen

HOME
Even though I’m sitting here with a bag I’ve packed for the weekend, when the weekend is over I’m going back to my home, the place where I still need to connect to the freakin’ Internet *which, thanks to Time Warner Cable is happening next week. But still three months ago I didn’t have a home and that started to suck.

LIFE
I’d say the last three months have given me perspective. A whole, new perspective. I can’t believe how much my world has changed in just three months.

I think this weekend I’ll enjoy the reminder.